Brodie asked me again recently why he has to go to school. So I gently repeated all of the reasons. His answer?
Well I want to learn stuff but I don't understand why I have to grow up.
I had kind of figured that this whole going to school thing was going to be harder on me than it was on Brodie. Selfish I know.
In fact I think what has surprised me is that we've both coped well. I wonder if it's because I've known this day was coming for a long time. And the tug of my heartstrings is equally matched by my excitement over Brodie's future. He's completed his first term in Primary 1 and we are so proud of him.
I've always imagined that each little gain he and I made in learning, developing, stretching, reaching was helping to stengthen our bond. We used to be literally joined by a flesh and blood chord which at birth was transformed into an invisible one.
And I never wanted nor expected that bond to be so short and restrictive that he could never stray far from me. I wanted it to be invisible so it would never distract him from exploring and learning. I wanted it to be strong and elastic so he would always know I'm here and always be able to find his way back. I wanted it to be a comfort and to provide that extra little bit of courage. I know that only time will tell but I'll be forever hopeful that I've managed to pull off a superhero mum feat with my invisible web.